Good morning, beloved,

I’m sorry if yesterday felt a little bit odd..I had to be out of my house by 7am. 🙂 I’m back today. 🙂 I did really enjoy Chuck Smith’s sermon tho..

Anyway, did you know you could see the Northern Lights last night in Illinois? Well, we tried to..we didn’t..so we came in and showed the kids videos of the beauty of the lights. The moon was also huge  and the stars were out in large number. The kids were trying to count them.

I’m having a problem lately with not being in the moment. I’m in the next moment. Planning ahead. Making sure I have what I need for the next moment. And I’m missing the blessing that is in this moment. I don’t like this.

I could give you reasons why but I just don’t want to miss any more moments with my kids. I just don’t. They are growing up way too fast. I’m worrying. I’m wondering. I’m planning. I’m fixing.

And you know what? I believe God is just saying to me cease striving and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10) I think this is very closely linked with His other working motto in my life:

Luke 9

²³And He said to all, If any person wills to come after Me, let him deny himself [^[g]disown himself, ^[h]forget, lose sight of himself and his own interests, ^[i]refuse and give up himself] and take up his cross daily and follow Me [^[j]cleave steadfastly to Me, conform wholly to My example in living and, if need be, in dying also].

²⁴For whoever would preserve his life and save it will lose and destroy it, but whoever loses his life for My sake, he will preserve and save it [^[k]from the penalty of eternal death].

Just get on the floor with them. Answer their guess what questions. Put down the washcloth and sit with a doll in your hand instead. That’s my ministry. Deny my supposed right to have a perfect house. My kids could care less if the house was in perfect shape.

In the years to come, I really don’t think they will remember how clean my house was, will they? Listen to them talk about their events coming up. Cuddle with them. I don’t remember that about my house growing up (not saying anything about cleanliness here) but I am saying, my Dad was at all my softball games. My Mom was home every day when I came from school. I always could count on them. I still can…

Lord, will you help me?