Last night, I missed out on going to my kids’ riding lesson. I weighed carefully whether I could manage this after a busy day and decided. It feels surreal to be here. I never thought I would be here. I could put on a brave face and tell you, I’m fine. It’s fine. Everything is fine.
I’m in pain. People ask, where? I do a quick scan and can reveal where most of the pain resides. Have you tried? Probably.
I am becoming more and more convinced that the most important part of my healing is my mind. Training my mind to focus on one thing at a time. What is the most important thing to focus on in this moment? If I try to look forward or look behind, sadness creeps in. If I stay with this moment, then I know this is where I am right now.
Which leads me to 1 John. I believe this is my calling, what God has given to me as my calling. Let me share with you the verses that hit me today.
“[I am writing about] what existed from the beginning, what we have heard, what we have seen with our eyes, what we have looked at and touched with our hands, concerning the Word of Life [the One who existed even before the beginning of the world, Christ]— and the Life [an aspect of His being] was manifested, and we have seen [it as eyewitnesses] and testify and declare to you [the Life], the eternal Life who was [already existing] with the Father and was [actually] made visible to us [His followers]— what we have seen and heard we also proclaim to you, so that you too may have fellowship [as partners] with us. And indeed our fellowship [which is a distinguishing mark of born-again believers] is with the Father, and with His Son Jesus Christ. We are writing these things to you so that our joy [in seeing you included] may be made complete [by having you share in the joy of salvation].”
1 John 1:1-4 AMP
https://bible.com/bible/1588/1jn.1.1-4.AMP
I won’t ever write as eloquently as John. However, I have finally found my purpose in these writings of mine. I want to write about what existed from the beginning. I want to write about what I’ve heard, what I’ve seen, what I have looked at and touched with my hands. I want to write about the Word of Life and how He has changed my life. I want to declare how He has changed me and may my testimony be a blessing to my Father in heaven. Our fellowship. I want to write about all these things so my joy may be complete. I want to share the joy of salvation.
I want joy. I want it for me and I want it for you. As John says, this happens by declaring the truth. Over and over again. Truth to hold close. Truth to memorize when I am awake in the middle of the night. Truth to speak when my words can slice and dice. Truth to know when my circumstances and body overwhelm me. So that’s what I’m setting out to do from now one. I want to change my thinking, train my body and mind to teach them both to heed the word in my heart.
Join me? Let’s teach ourselves to speak the truth to our souls.
Comment
Amen!💞