Good morning, friend,
Today finds me with a dog snuggled next to me on one side and a cuppa on the other. The loud dishwasher (which should have been run…) is chugging away. The darkness still fills the house. Lights under the stove and cabinets cast strange images across the walls. The wind is blowing fiercely. Trains disrupt the quiet, shaking the neighborhood. All these impressions I have run through my mind, fast, and I realize these are benign thoughts but the same can be said for thoughts that are not so cozy, so picturesque.
I wrote about this yesterday. Allowing my mind to think on, allowing myself to waste time brings me to a night like last night, where I needed to make some decisions. I hate writing posts like this, but change isn’t easy, it isn’t fun, it is, however, necessary. Facebook has given me an outlet to share my blog. I am grateful. It gives me a chance to stay in touch (truly) with messenger with a few people. However, these past few weeks have found me trolling more and more. Searching more and more. and in the end, losing more and more. Gosh, that sounded kind of nice.
Truth is, I’m spending WAY too much time. And today, I deleted facebook off my phone. I took Internet Explorer off my start menu. I took email off my start menu. I’m writing a sign for my laptop. Face time. Not Facebook. I am seriously thinking of asking my husband to change my password, like I can’t handle just saying no? On my own?
I know where the trolling habit began. It began with a hurt, to cover a hurt, to help me feel better. Sheesh, even as I type it, I see the lie. I know where to go to “feel better”. I know where to go to HEAL the hurt. And it ain’t Facebook, folks.
Please, don’t misunderstand me. Facebook isn’t the enemy. Time is. I’m running out of time. I just have to look at my sweet kids and I know…I’m running out of time. Completely. So spending it foolishly? Oh, dear God, forgive me. Have you ever noticed how instructive personal pain is?
*Sigh*
But don’t let it faze you. Stick with what you learned and believed, sure of the integrity of your teachers—why, you took in the sacred Scriptures with your mother’s milk! There’s nothing like the written Word of God for showing you the way to salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. Every part of Scripture is God-breathed and useful one way or another—showing us truth, exposing our rebellion, correcting our mistakes, training us to live God’s way. Through the Word we are put together and shaped up for the tasks God has for us. 2 Timothy 3:16-17MSG
Stick with what I’ve learned and believed…
So, starting on my Monday, I’m back to a Precepts class at a local church. It’s time for me to study the Word with other women and study it the way God wired my brain. I’m excited and ready to begin. The timing couldn’t be more perfect and I know not a soul in the class. I’ve studied Precepts style since Luke was an infant..wow, ten years, but it’s been a long time since I’ve been able to join a class.
How about you? How are you being counseled and shown through the Word? Maybe you are in a time where you can’t join a class (been there, done that), are you attending a church that preaches the Word? Are you studying His Word ? Please avail yourself of time, of quiet with Him.
Every part of Scripture is God-breathed and useful one way or another…
At night, over the past few months, I have listened to the Daily Audio Bible. Now that, my friends, has been a huge blessing to my nighttime routine. Huge. What this man, Brian Hardin, has done…well, I’m going to let him tell you about it.
Welcome to the Daily Audio Bible!
Some nights I fall asleep to him reading. Some nights I listen to the entire thing. Some nights I pray alongside of him. I’ve never read the Bible through and through in its entirety. Right now we are heading through Jeremiah, 2nd Timothy and always through Psalms and Proverbs. Love it.
Showing the Truth…
I believe these insights about Facebook were God directed. Nobody said any of this to me. Nobody had to…it was the Holy Spirit’s direction on me last night into this day today. He has direction for my life! Each time I get slogged down in trolling through…well, you know, I’m not doing His work, I’m wasting time. How has His Spirit been guiding you? Directing you?
I’m going to tell you, as I’ve been writing, I’ve already been tempted. Already been wondering, what’s on Facebook? Any messages? Nobody would have to know. Wow. The truth is…the truth is…He does.
Exposing our rebellion…
Correcting our mistakes...
Training us to live God’s way...
When I was little, there was a very cool game that my neighbors owned. I would go down to their house and beg to play. Every time. I loved it. Operation. This guy laid out on a table, his innards exposed to all and I had to pull them out gently, not touching the sides. Ya, right. I always felt a little bad for the guy. Exposed. Revealed. Known.
When God operates on me, when He operates on you, it can hurt. It can sting. It is revealing. It is painful. Yet, we learn. You don’t have to share your learning experiences with the entire blogging community like I’m doing here but my hope and prayer is that by my sharing of my weakness, you may see the power of Christ in me. Not by my strength, nor by my power, but by His.
Just like the Operation guy can’t pull out his own innards, we can’t pull out our own sins, learn from them and live free on our own. We need Jesus. We need His Holy Spirit.
BECAUSE…
Through the Word we are put together and shaped up for the tasks God has for us.
Run the race He has for you.
Pray on. Pray on.
Comment
This was just so well said, Cara! I think we had the same childhood neighbor, I would beg for her to get out Operation.
Good for you for seeing where you need to set boundaries and implementing them. Yesterday I heard on the radio how many times people check their phones and it was just adding conviction to the thoughts I had the day before. I really need to keep an eye out on how distracting that phone is. I tried to imagine my life without the apps on it that I constantly check. I really do want some discipline with my phone, but I am wondering how I am going to go about that. If only it had a timed password to lock me out certain hours of the day.
Very excited you are getting back into a precept class. I hope it is a really good group and you do not let any fears of your personality take over as in the past. You will be blessed and you will be a blessing in this group. 🙂
Love you!
PS did you walk? I confess I’m not sure if I will today. I should, I need to make up for Tues.